Real stories from my life that involve my veganism.
New Coworker: "Wow, you look, uh, really healthy for a vegan!"
My mom: "So you're still doing the vegan thing?"
Different new coworker: "So you like to bake, right? I've got this great recipe."
Me: "I do, but I probably can't eat it. Does it have eggs?"
Coworker: "Yeah, but you can have eggs, right?"
Me: "No."
Coworker: "Eggs aren't from animals--I mean, they're from chickens, but that doesn't count."
Me: "Yes, it does. Lol."
Coworker: "Can you eat gluten?"
Me: "Yes."
Coworker: "What about butter?"
Me: "No."
Coworker: "Wow! That's wild. Why would you do that?"
My aunt: "Wow, the vegan stuffing tastes the exact same as the regular stuffing! Except with more carrots."
Me: "Does the tempura have egg in it?"
Waitress: "No, it's veggie tempura."
Me: "But does the batter have egg in it?"
Waitress: "No, it's vegetables, like onion and sweet potato."
Me: "But does the batter have egg in it."
Waitress: "No, it's veggie tempura."
Me: "How do they make it?"
Waitress, rolling her eyes: "They dip the vegetables in egg--"
Me: "Nevermind, no tempura."
My mom: "So, still vegan, huh?"
Bestie: "So I pan-fry the bacon, and then put it on the burgers--"
Me: "What! I can't have them if you do that!"
Bestie: "Oh, shit! I'm so sorry, I totally--hey!"
Roommate's sister: "I subbed the potatoes out for cauliflower mash for your vegan dish!"
My mom: "I've never had vegan butter, what does it taste like?"
My dad: "...It's margarine."
My mom: "Yeah, what does that taste like?"
My mom: "And you're still vegan, right?"